Sleeping lovingly: this is how you give your baby security and trust

If your baby keeps crying at night, should you give him attention or let him cry? The answer to this question has changed significantly over the years. While your own father and mother were probably advised to let the baby cry, we now know that it is important to give your child love and attention when he or she needs it. You can read exactly how that works in this article.

As a mother of four, I can encourage you to embrace the loving sleep approach. Away with those old-fashioned methods that keep a baby crying until it is completely exhausted! Let's look at a way in which you can work on trust and the feeling of security. Because that is exactly what your baby needs to sleep well.

Create a pleasant sleeping environment

The environment in which your baby sleeps has a huge impact. Therefore, always create a calm and safe environment, where your baby is not distracted by all kinds of sensory stimuli. Ensure a comfortable temperature (between 18 and 20 degrees is ideal!) and avoid bright colors, loud noises and bright light. Instead, choose calm stimuli, such as soft music or white noise. This calms your baby down.

Choose a nice bed in which your baby feels safe. A young baby does not yet know exactly where his body ends and may feel a bit lost in a bed that is too large. So make the bed shorter, so that the feet are against the bottom, and place a small cuddle cloth above the head. This gives a feeling of boundaries and security.

Bonus tip: with the NUNKI sheet you provide even more security and boundaries. The sheet provides gentle pressure on the upper body, creating a familiar and safe feeling in the womb. It helps you relax and process stimuli, making it easier for your child to fall asleep and stay asleep.

Use body contact and proximity

As a parent of a young baby, you will probably recognize that your baby likes to be close to you. For example, there is a good chance that your baby will fall asleep faster if he or she is on top of you. Body contact and proximity have a positive effect on the feeling of safety. Therefore, give your baby enough skin-to-skin contact and make sure you cuddle a lot.

In any case, it is important to start 'destimulating' half an hour before going to bed; removing incentives. During these 30 minutes, leave all screens off and only pay attention to physical contact with your baby. This calms your baby and gives him a satisfied feeling, so that he can slowly become sleepy.

Also pay attention to body contact when you put your baby to bed. Gently stroke the head or place your hand on the tummy. This gives your baby a nice and safe feeling, making it easier for him to fall asleep.

Follow a fixed bedtime ritual

A fixed bedtime ritual creates a feeling of predictability and security. It ensures that your baby learns to understand when it is time to go to sleep. Choose quiet activities such as cuddling, a baby massage, a warm bath, reading a quiet story or singing a song. What your personal routine looks like is actually not that important. What is important is that you always do it in the same order. By repeating the routine every day, your baby will prepare for a good night's sleep.

Be patient during jumps

Many babies sleep well for the first few months, until a jump throws a spanner in the works. The 4 month jump is a good example of this. In short, between 14 and 20 weeks your baby learns to see connections between events. This is a completely new perspective that your baby will take some time to get used to. The world suddenly looks very different and that is quite exciting. Your child also suddenly discovers that mommy comes when he cries, so he eagerly takes advantage of that!

During a jump, your baby often just needs some time to get used to the new skills and the new perspective on the world. That's the good news: your baby's bad mood is only temporary! It is therefore important to have some patience as a parent. Believe me, the situation will pass. The difficult period simply means that your child is learning, developing and growing, so that can only be positive! Try to enjoy the moments with your baby, because before you know it he will turn into a toddler. That's easier said than done, I know that better than anyone, but it is important to realize that time flies by. It will be all right.


Frederieke Meihuizen

Owner Fedde&Kees®

Ik ben Frederieke, getrouwd met Ewoud en mama van 4 kindjes. Na op veel plekken gewoond te hebben, ben ik gesetteld in Nieuwkoop. Ik werkte in de commercie tot mijn vierde kindje geboren werd. Fedde was een huilbaby en vanuit deze wanhoop heb ik de producten van Fedde&Kees bedacht. Ik gooide mijn leven om en begon met ondernemen. Sinds 2018 help ik andere ouders naar een betere slaap!